How will I know when I'm done grieving?

As the reality of the loss settles in, you will begin adjusting to living without the physical presence of the person who died. As you respond to new challenges, new roles and new difficulties you will begin to move through the experience of grief and form a new identity. Eventually you will discover renewed energy in living as your grief begins to change.

The following indicators in your life might help you identify that you are moving toward adjusting to living with your grief:

• Full realization of the reality of the death
  
• Understanding of being changed by grief rather than getting over grief
  
• Successes with adjustments to role changes as a result of the loss of the relationship
  
• A change in how intensely you are preoccupied with thoughts of the loved one
  
• A sense of future goals or direction
  
• A return of the ability to recognize and receive joy from experiences
  
• Return of routine eating and sleeping patterns
  
• Establishment of new and healthy relationships

There was no sudden, striking and emotional transition. Like the warming of a room or the coming of daylight, when you first notice them they have already been going on for some time.           -- C.S. Lewis A Grief Observed